Friday, September 21, 2007

I Get Bored...

It's no secret, and a perhaps a personal flaw, that I have a short attention span for jobs. I average about 18 months at any job. I made it 26 months at my last regular job. That's the longest I've stayed in any employment position. (Working for Murder Mystery Players for the past five years doesn't really count since each show is different and I have played a wide variety of roles.)

My night-owl activity tonight was to take a free career test on the website

Wooo... Whoever formulated this test is certifiably insane, high on crack or just plain mean! After answering 105 questions, I read over my exciting career recommendations. My #1 match for a career was (drum roll, please) manufacturing! Below is the sample of possible dream jobs for yours-truly in manufacturing.

In the United States, the manufacturing industry includes these major sectors:

Aerospace Products and Parts
Chemical Manufacturing (except medicine/pharmaceutical)
Computer and Electronic Products and Components
Food Manufacturing
Machinery Manufacturing
Motor Vehicle and Parts Manufacturing
Pharmaceutical and Medicine Manufacturing
Steel Manufacturing
Textile, Textile Product and Apparel Manufacturing

This info was followed by an advertisement for "National Heavy Equipment Operator School." Wow! I do like to sew and plant things in the yard, thus I must confess that I like to work with my hands, but manufacturing as a career? Um, no.

My #2 career match was sales & marketing with sample job titles:

Sales Representative
Market Research Analyst
Media Buyer/Planner
Promotions Manager
Public Relations Representative

Getting warmer. Lots of experience in these areas including retail management, communications / advertising technician at a major insurance company and marketing for a big, local theatre.

My #3 career match was visual arts with sample job titles:

Graphic Designer
Art Director
Sketch artist

I like to paint and draw. I've often said that if I win the lottery, I'll go back to school and take more art classes. I'd be an unpopular artist though, because I like to make things look pretty and I have a low tolerance for high-concept art that needs a lot of explanation (a.k.a. self-indulgent tripe.) My attitude is that a particular artwork either speaks to you or doesn't. If the art speaks to you then you decide if you want it in your house or you don't. Mine is not lofty reasoning, but it works. Try it the next time you're at an art museum or gallery.

#4 was creative / performing arts with sample job titles:

Fashion Designer

The website offered the grim advisement: "Employment of actors, producers, and directors is expected to grow on par with all other occupations through 2014. Although a growing number of people will aspire to enter these professions, many will leave the field early because the work—when it is available—is hard, the hours are long, and the pay is inconsistent. Competition for jobs will be stiff, in part because the large number of highly trained and talented actors auditioning for roles generally exceeds the number of parts that become available. Only performers with the most stamina and talent will find regular employment."

Very oddly, the advertisement for this section was for "The ABC Dog Obedience Instructor Program is structured to offer you the convenience and cost of a Home Study program with the added benefit of working one on one with some of the most talented trainers in the industry."

Ding, ding, ding!!! We have a winner for the weirdest job list and advertisement pairing! We also have a winner with the sample job title of "actor." My absolute dream job is to land a part as a sitcom mom on a popular series. No joking, no sarcasm. I just need to lose more weight and get myself out to Los Angeles. And get discovered. And get cast in the right role. And have the show become a hit with viewers and critics alike. Yep...