Saturday, December 08, 2007

Cavity Creeps and Home Intruders


Thursday I went to my lovely spa-like dentist's office for a check-up. My warm neck wrap and hand/arm massage were a tiny bit marred by the discovery of two small cavities in neighboring teeth. From age eight up until age thirty-one, I didn't have any cavities. Now it seems as though I get two cavities every two years. Remember those Crest toothpaste commercials from the early 1980s with the Cavity Creeps invading Toothopolis? These nasty grey creatures that looked like rocks with humanoid features attacked teeth only to be rebuffed by Crest toothpaste. I brush at least twice a day with a fancy electric toothbrush and toothpaste, and I floss a few times a week, but the Cavity Creeps somehow prevail.

Earlier today I was home while my next-door neighbors' house was robbed. Someone, or some group of people, kicked in the front door, violently tearing out the door frame and landing the door with the locked dead bolt on the floor of my neighbors' living room. I heard the loud thud and thought it was the noise of a big construction truck barreling down the street, hitting a bump. I even looked out the window to try and spot the big truck, but didn't see one. I saw a man slowly getting into the passenger side of a jeep-type-vehicle in front of my neighbors' house. He didn't speed off. He wasn't carrying anything. I think he even saw me looking out and he didn't so much as flinch. I thought nothing more of it. My neighbor said that the thief/thieves took only a desktop computer. They left the TV, radio, VCR and all other valuables. I was shocked at this news. My neighbors have an alarm system with a sign in their yard alerting would-be intruders to the alarm. I never heard an alarm today, but the alarm company did alert my neighbors and the police to the break-in. I feel awful that I didn't understand what was happening when I heard the noise. Maybe by drawing back the curtain and looking out, I made the guy/guys leave before they were done hauling things out? It didn't happen to me or my house, and yet I feel scared. I feel unsafe in my home now. I want an eardrum-bursting-loud alarm system, a large canister of pepper spray in every room and a really big dog whose size and bark relay the message to stay-the-heck-away. (But I want my big dog to actually be happy, nice and well-adjusted, of course.)

You do everything you can to fend off the Cavity Creeps and home invaders, but have to face the sad fact that despite your best efforts, no defense system is completely impervious. If I can sleep tonight, I'll probably dream about Cavity Creeps breaking in to steal my computer.