Non-Union Rates

I got a casting call email today for a prime-time network TV show filming in Austin. They need female extras to play prostitutes. The project offers non-union pay rates that will be "at least minimum wage" with "overtime pay after eight hours." Extras must be available for twelve hour shifts with most scenes filming outside on these hot summer days.

I hope that real prostitutes don't have to work twelve hour shifts in Texas summer heat, and that they make a whole lot more than minimum wage. (Naturally I wish that no one had to prostitute themselves or others.)

Though my retail job is no gem, I'll stick with it for the time being if this is the quality of acting work that Austin has to offer now.

Real Nice

When I come into my millions, this is how I'll roll:

Range Rover Evoque Pure

Trip Which Light Fantastic

The pendant light over our dining room table gave up the ghost, dropping one of three pendants, and stripping the wiring in the process. The light fixture had a good six year run sporting three different pendant styles. If I'm honest, I never loved the old light fixture. Cue the perfect excuse for a new chandelier.

Light A is a knockoff of a chandelier I found on a much more exclusive/expensive shopping site for about 1/3 the price. Chad and I find it charming and funky. As you know, we love Halloween and this chandelier screams haunted house chic meets old world charm.

Light B is more mainstream, more traditional meets modern. As for the price, that 40% employee discount across a number of brands from my retail job makes the pricing the icing on the tasteful vanilla cake. 

Our dining table has a weathered ebony finish with red leather-ish simple, high-backed side chairs. Chad and I both think either chandelier will match just fine. 

By the time you weigh in, we'll probably already have the new light installed. A bee in the bonnet of two over-doers buzzes insistently. Leave a comment, so we can at least see if you guessed correctly which we chose.

Put a snail on it!

At my retail job, we borrow a catchphrase from the show Portlandia, and often say, "put a bird on it!" Birds were all the hotness a few years ago in everything from fashion fabrics to decorative accents to wallpaper. Sadly, their are still too many birds gracing pillows, bedding, bowls, dishes, mugs and cake-domes at my retail workplace. It's over, guys. Move on.

A few months ago, I predicted to Chad that snails are the new hotness in design. We have one ceramic snail on our bedroom dresser and one small ceramic snail in a terrarium in the dressing room. I found sparkly snail ornaments last Christmas. Indeed, I've seen snails popping up on fabrics and wallpapers too. Not so much gracing food serving pieces, unless you count escargot served on dishes. Eww.

I've been struggling with working 37 hours a week on average, but with no employee benefits other than my meager hourly wage. My retail workplace got fussed at by corporate last week for scheduling too many of us more than 29.5 hours a week consistently without giving benefits. Last week, I only worked (surprise!) 29.5 hours over five workdays. It was pretty nice. I almost caught up on housekeeping and actually cared for the pets properly. Next week I work (surprise!) 37 hours again.

A coworker unwittingly informed me last night that the full-time visual merchandising position for which I thought I might apply is already promised to someone else. The past month that I've been working with the visual merchandising team I was (unknown to me) merely serving as a placeholder until the other person can start. SURPRISE! & EWW.

That other person can have the full-time visual merchandising position. I've had a taste of that job. Very little of the work is actually creative. Mostly the job involves cleaning the store, making sure proper signage is in place for constantly changing sales, doing markdowns, toting 30 pound shelves up & down 12 foot ladders and dribbling water into dying plants.

I'm going to put a snail on my retail job, figuratively speaking, and slow down. I'm going to limit my available hours so that I'll truly be working part-time, hopefully 25 hours over four workdays per week. Maybe if I don't give so much of my time to a job I don't even really like, it won't feel so taxing. Maybe I'll have time and mental energy to find a job I like better. Maybe I'll just have more time to myself.

Three Days Off Both Paid Jobs!

I had three days off in a row from my retail job and my acting job this Memorial Day weekend. It was awesome. A girl could get used to that whole sleeping late, not studying scripts and not going to work routine. I read a magazine and started a book. Crazy party girl, that's me!

Of course, I used a good portion of that time to get caught up on my housewife and pet-guardian chores, but I consistently like being a housewife and pet-guardian.

I did not paint my nails, which only happens a few times a year in response to insomnia or extreme boredom. I also did not paint any walls in the house. Maybe these luxurious projects can happen next time I have three days off in a row from both of my paid jobs. Place your bets now as to when that might happen!

Chad Eats Stomach Bugs for Breakfast

I had a nasty stomach bug this week. According to my friend from work, Nurse* Sabrina, if it's coming out both ends, it's food-poisoning. If it's only coming out one end, it's a stomach bug. I had to text my make-it-pretty boss-lady at 5:45 A.M. Wednesday that I'd be out sick. I was seriously sad to miss a make-it-pretty shift, but would have gladly missed a sales shift.

Wednesday I had six rounds of stomach bug symptoms and four naps. It was pretty miserable, but a darn fine excuse to eat nothing but mashed potatoes for dinner. I felt a bit achy and weak the next day at work as I hauled thirty pound shelves up a twelve foot ladder.

Chad did not get sick. He has a stomach of iron. According to Chad, he, "eats stomach bugs for breakfast," with no ill effects. Lucky.

*Nurse Sabrina is not actually a nurse. I assign the nickname Nurse to anyone from whom I glean medical information. It makes everything a tad more legit in my mind.

Let's Talk About My Ennui

en·nui

 [ahn-wee, ahn-wee; French ahn-nwee]

noun

a feeling of utter weariness and discontent resulting from satiety or lack of interest; boredom: The endless lecture produced an unbearable ennui.

Origin: 
1660–70;  < French:  boredom; Old French enui  displeasure

I now work thirty seven hours a week on average at that retail place. Pretty sneaky how they don't give me a full forty hours, so they don't have to give me any benefits. Employees are dropping like flies at that retail place. There was a mass exodus of five different managers over the past six months. Only the poor, pitiful, beat-down store manager remains with a few new managers who are still struggling to find their footing. About six weeks ago, I gave my two week notice that I wanted the heck out of Crazytown. (Crazytown referring to that retail place.) After some wailing, gnashing of teeth and negotiating, I was persuaded to stay in Crazytown with the understanding that I would work visual merchandising (a.k.a. the make it pretty team), and help with sales "once in a while". I currently spend about two-thirds of my work week doing sales (Heaven help me, how I loathe working sales) and about one-third of my work week making it pretty. This is not cool, and not what I bargained for. 

I'm so tired from my physically and emotionally intensive workplace, that I have little energy for housekeeping, grocery shopping, pet care and general fun-having. 

My sweet husband, Chad runs his own successful business. It takes many, many hours of work each week. I feel terrible asking Mr. Workerbee (a.k.a. Chad) to do chores or pet care beyond walking our sweet, pesky dog. He also has very little free time, and very little energy to spare.

I don't like my car, but count my many blessings that I have a car to drive, and am not stuck relying on public transportation (not one of Austin's strong points) or biking (bike lanes also not one of Austin's strong points).

Austin has too much traffic and too many people. Sometimes I feel a tendency to become a very happy shut-in, until I remember that I don't really like to cook. I need to get out to restaurants and salad bars, because we can not live on Luna bars alone.

I love my four pets, and am so happy they are healthy and still with me. However, there are too many pets and not enough of me to give them all the attention and care that they deserve. Of course, I'm keeping them! Friends for life, and all that!

I tried to arrange a monthly outing for the friends I wish I saw more. The first outing drew five people out of twelve invited. The second outing drew three people out of eleven invited. The third outing drew me and only me. I felt like a jerk trying to reserve a table for five at a not-very-busy restaurant, sending texts of the where-are-you variety and leaving in defeat after it was clear that no one else could attend, and that the server wanted me out of there. So I stopped arranging the monthly outing. I got one email wanting to know if I would revive the monthly outing, to which I replied, "Nope, but you go ahead and try. Good luck."

In short, I am running with the rats in this crazy race. I am tired. I should be enjoying my many blessings, but I don't have enough time or energy. I think many of my friends are in the same boat. I'm crunching numbers and brainstorming on how to make day to day life better. Send me happy thoughts.

Wishing you peace, prosperity and enough time to enjoy your life.

Flower Power Pow-wow

Saturday I led a workshop on flower arranging along with other members of the make-it-pretty-team at my retail job. We referenced The Flower Recipe Book, and used peonies, carnations (a lovely & much under-appreciated flower), Bells of Ireland along with pink and green berry sprays. The berry sprays for the store's bouquet got swiped by class participants, but I promise they were pretty.

Workshop participants went home with their own floral arrangements, a cute Weck jar, pruners and a copy of The Flower Recipe Book. I must say that each arrangement was prettier than the next!

Fancy Hoses

I made a window display for the gardening supplies and plants sold at my retail job. You need fancy hoses? We got 'em.

Click on the photos to make them bigger. Apologies for the reflections of the window.

Making It Pretty

I am one step closer to officially joining the visual merchandising team (or as I call it the "make it pretty squad") at my retail job. I'll still have to work sales twice a week, but will spend the majority of my time off the sales floor away from the cash registers and constantly ringing phones.

When tempted to find greener employment grass, I count my many blessings in the form of short commute to work (less than 5 miles) in the downtown design district, free garage parking, creative coworkers who I like a lot, generous employee discount across several brands, and within walking distance to my favorite shopping spots: Whole Foods, Book People and Anthropologie.

Being a full-time gym-bunny/trophy-wife/lady-who-lunches isn't an option at this point in my life. I have to work for my mental health, financial health and socializing health. Plus I usually grab a salad from Whole Foods for lunch for my physical health. Mmm... Whole Foods salad bar.

It's About Time!

Finally! I have another dinner mystery show on the calendar. And a new script to memorize. *sigh* Click on the flyer below to make it larger.

It's been a month? Already?

Oh hi. I really meant to get in touch, and update the blog. My part-time job went full-time without my consent. I also had a nasty sinus situation. So, you know, busy-busy!

Here are some hard truths:

That retail store for which I work made some scratchy sheets, which I bought, and with which I am unhappy. 100% cotton? Really? No steel wool in there?

I spent several glorious days building out displays at my retail job. I did not love the 5:00 AM start time, but I did love making things pretty and organized. I also loved the very limited interaction with customers. The boss-lady said I did a great job, so I look forward to more days of building prettiness in the near future, I hope.

For every ten lovely, courteous customers, there is one real stinker of a human being who can ruin your whole day.

A lady stood at the cash wrap of my retail job on a busy Saturday and cut her fingernails, letting the cut bits fall to floor. In public.

A professional recruiter I know wants to place me in an office job where I will make a lot more money. I want to make sure I have a window with a decent view and natural lighting at said job, or the money won't be worth it.

I performed in eight dinner shows between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I have not performed in one dinner show or theatrical show since Christmas. Can I still call myself a part-time actress?

I barely have time to keep up with household chores, let alone pursue any creative activities beyond cutting Chad's hair. I really like cutting Chad's hair, but am not at all comfortable cutting anyone else's hair, so don't ask.

Hope to have something more fabulous to share before another month passes. Fingers crossed!

Taking my Employee Discount to Bed

As threatened nearly a year ago, I finally gave the bedroom a bit of a facelift with my employee discount. I should qualify that statement with the following information: my employee discount on top of markdowns on top of a 15% off all markdowns flash sale. Victory!

New bedding

Restyled dresser with new candle and new snail

The candle is lavender from Meow Meow Tweet. I love these bath products & home scents so much, I bought up 3 sets. Yum! The ceramic snail, I can't explain. When he arrived at the store, I wasn't feeling him. Slowly, after seeing him around, he grew on me, until I had to bring him home. I like to think he will remind me to slow down. 

Oh. No.

Never, never, never.

Features a 3 inch wedge heel for only $265 from Piperlime.

Photographic Evidence

Most often Marigold and Kenji ignore each other. Occasionally they fight with each other. Once in a blue moon they cuddle with each other.

Also note that they are actually lounging on one of the many pet beds at the 1952 House. Typically they opt for the people furniture.

Taking Inventory

Yesterday the retail store at which I work nearly full-time lately closed half the day for inventory. I spent seven hours quietly researching item numbers, solving mysteries of the "what the heck is this item and how old is it?" variety, counting and double-checking other people's counting. I enjoyed it. After inventory the store opened for business. I spent just over an hour trying to hide from customers as I restocked items on the selling floor.

Taking inventory at work prompts me to take an honest self-inventory. I'm struggling with what I want to do for work. I make far too little money for how hard I work at that retail store. In the six months of the fiscal year that I worked there, I produced just over $250,000 in sales. My reward (other than the sad hourly wage)? Business cards with my name on them. Yes. I am also underwhelmed.

Because my first true love for avocation and vocation is acting, I figured that a retail job would give me a somewhat flexible schedule and a "leave it at the workplace" job description. I am growing restless with the dinner theatre scene, and feel ready to step away from that. I left my talent agency this year after too many fruitless commercial auditions. I do not consider smiling until my face breaks into spasms while talking about car dealers or computers to be acting.

I want more personal fulfillment from my time. I also want to make more money for the time I spend working.

I have a preternatural sense for color, scale and placement when it comes to decorating rooms, curating outfits or sewing projects. I hoped to join the visual display team when I took the retail job. Unfortunately, I am pigeonholed as a great salesperson. While I stay calm in the face of angst, confusion and conflict, it takes a toll on my emotional energy. I need to step out of customer service before I turn into a misanthrope.

I want a job that challenges me creatively with a balance between visual problem solving and communicating. I also want more control of deliverables besides telling a client whether or not an item is in stock. If that must-have item is out of stock at my current retail job, it's probably literally on a slow boat from China.

I need to find a new job. Yesterday.

Missing People and Stuff

Two managers from my retail job moved to San Antonio. One of them I liked pretty well, and one of them is the long-lost fabulous brother I never had, but wish I did. Long-lost Fab Brother got every joke and every obscure reference I ever made in his earshot. I will miss seeing both bosses regularly.

My best cheerleader (so positive with so much energy!) and also favorite shopping buddy moved to Brooklyn so she could work in Manhattan. I feel a tiny bit lost, my social calendar certainly emptier.

I don't like the hair color or hair cut I got last week. I miss the four inches of my hair that so unceremoniously hit the floor after I asked to have two inches maximum removed. I miss the blond I asked for my hair to be. As my hair is now, when the humidity is high, one might wonder if Carrot Top and I share a hair stylist.

I miss my aforementioned BMW.

Somebody make a greeting card for this weird ennui I'm experiencing, and send it to me post haste!

Heartbreaker

Friends, fans & foes,

I miss my unreliable, cranky, old BMW something fierce. I miss the gentle, German hum of the engine as it effortlessly accelerated. I miss the way I felt safe driving my BMW, because if was both sure-footed and solid. I miss the implied sophistication, the amazingly comfortable seats and the beautiful styling of that car.

I traded in my 2003 BMW 3 series for a new Mazda 3 back in October. I was fed up with the growing list of repairs and upkeep that the BMW needed. The maintenance was proving to be a much bigger, and more unpredictable, financial strain than I could bear. I was tired of driving very much out of my way to the BMW service center, and scheduling the repairs, and waiting while the repairs happened, or the stress of driving an unfamiliar loaner car.

I reasoned that the monthly payment on a brand new (my first new car purchase, having always bought used cars) Mazda 3 would be about half of what I paid in an average month to keep the BMW running. I reasoned that a new Mazda 3 would get much better gas mileage than the old BMW. I reasoned that the new Mazda 3 would be a bright, fun color, even if I felt as if I was settling for the least offensive looking of the cars in my budget.

My new Mazda 3 is reliable, gets great mileage and is a bright blue color. I do not love it. It's just meh. It feels like driving a go-cart, lacks traction on rainy days and accelerates slowly with much high-pitched fanfare. It got a top crash-test safety rating but feels too lightweight and slightly rattly to endure much of a collision. If I'm honest, I think it is an ugly car inside and outside compared to my old BMW.

I had my first experience with the Mazda service (or lack thereof) department today. I arrived for my appointment and stood in the service lobby for a full five minutes while harried looking guys spoke in exasperated tones over the phone with other customers while avoiding eye contact with me. When a service department guy finally asked if I'd been helped yet, I said I was there for my scheduled 3 month maintenance. He barked, "What's the mileage on your car?", and when I didn't answer fast enough he added, "approximately?" I responded that it was approximately 1300 miles. "You're too early. You shouldn't be here until 5,000 miles. Come back at 5,000 miles." After a bit more grumbling, he finally asked my name, and said he'd set an email reminder for 3 months from now. No apology for my inconvenience, no further explanation, not even a "goodbye".

This Mazda service experience was a stark contrast to what I've become accustomed to at the BMW service center where a valet always greeted me by name and escorted me to my service advisor. Yes, after the warranty expired it was expensive, but it was so lovely to be treated with good manners and courtesy.

So here is my super-shallow new year resolution: to get my perky posterior back into a BMW as soon as I can. The lesson learned about driving luxury cars: only drive them while they are under warranty. The second the warranty is up, trade it in or turn it in, because I just can't afford the upkeep.

Wishing you peace and prosperity in 2013,
Jenn

Creatures were Stirring

I had a Martha Stewart moment and decided we needed a small, and fabulous, Christmas tree in the bedroom this year. Sonic loves to hunker down on the foot of the bed and meditate on the sparkly lights.

Of course there was a Christmas tree in the living room, complete with lucky kitties and monkeys.

We decked the dog.

We hung stockings on the pub mirror, which is the next best thing to our nonexistent chimney. I love dragons, especially of the Schumacher variety.

Between a harried holiday schedule of working retail and performing in dinner theatre shows, I found a few moments for rest, reflection and relaxation. Hope you and yours did too.

I am so tired

6 hour retail shift
4 hours in traffic
2 hour dinner show
all in 4 inch heels
all today

After eight dinner theatre shows this month and a part-time retail job during what I contest is not "the mo-o-o-ost wonderful ti-i-i-me of the year", I am so looking forward to the next two days off from works. Between sleeping, rehydrating and getting reacquainted with the gym, there are several chores to do.

Don't be offended if you don't get a holiday card from me this year. I don't think I have it in me.

Above and beyond all that "merry and bright" business, be kind.