Saturday, November 03, 2007

What Is Death Cab for Cutie?


When I began this blog last year, I knew I wanted to keep it family-friendly. I decided not to post anything I wouldn't want my grandmother to read, because she's one of my few faithful readers. I don't want to alienate my fan-base. Initially, the blog was just to share photos and updates on the house projects. My parents thought that Chad and I were crazy for buying our old fixer-upper house. I wanted to demonstrate to them that we were not so much crazy as ambitious. At the start, I would email all of our family members whenever I posted an update. After about a month of posting, I sent a final blog-related email letting our family members know that they should check the blog once a week for updates, and that I would no longer email every time I posted something new. I wrote something snarky about how younger people check blogs almost as frequently as they brush their teeth, and that older people should get in the habit of checking the blog without an email notification. My dad emailed back that he checked my blog "twice a day. So haha." (Sadly, that was the last email I got from my dad. My mailbox was set to auto-delete messages every seven days, and I lost that email. I wish I still had it.)

My mom didn't check my blog for several months after my dad passed away. She was understandably busy and grieving. I got a little cavalier and made reference to her a few times in terms that were not absolutely glowing. Once my mom surfaced enough to read the blog again, I got a phone call from her. She said that I had written some not very nice things about her. (Really, it wasn't anything bad, just kinda sassy.) I told her that I'd written those things because I thought she wasn't reading, but now that I knew she was reading, I'd only say nice things.

I admit, there are times when I want to write something mean-spirited, or go off on a political rant, but I don't. I've thought many times of starting another blog where I could pour out my angry bile or mean observations. I always stop myself. There are plenty of political blogs without me starting another one. There are plenty of irreverent, mean-spirited blogs without me starting another one -- some of them very funny.

I maintain my decision to keep this blog safe for my grandma's and my mom's eyes. I thought I was sticking with this goal, until my mom clicked on my Amazon.com wish list icon in the sidebar of this blog last night and asked in an alarmed-sounding tone, "who is Death Cab for Cutie?!" Um, only like my fourth favorite band, Mom. I guess their band name isn't exactly parent-approved. I'm not going to edit my Amazon wish list. That's where I draw the self-censorship line. Plus I really want those CDs.

2 comments:

The Holmes said...

I promise not to get mad if you say sassy things about your mom :)

Jen M. said...

You know - that is one of the hardest aspects of blogging. At first, I let family and friends know, and then, as more people came to my blog and my desire to be totally authentic grew (and authentic me isn't always sweet) I REGRETTED the fact that these people, who initially supported me, still read my blog.

Now, I just post whatever I want (much of it cringeworthy and stuff I would never have to guts to actually say) and hope for the best. Life is too short.